Friendships are a beautiful gift in our lives and help us to ‘blossom’ with joy. Spending time with encouraging and supportive people helps us to be the best that we can be. Conversely, being with people who drain our energy can inhibit us from being our best selves.
Cheryl Richardson, author of Take Time for Your Life, provides us with the following types of friends to avoid, so that we may experience the rewarding relationships we deserve:
This is a person who consistently blames you and/or everyone else for her problems. The world and the people in it always seem to create havoc for this person, and instead of taking responsibility for her life, she’d rather blame others.
This person likes to hear his own voice. He constantly complains about what isn’t working in his life and yet never does anything about it. While you’re being drained, he actually gets energy from complaining and dumping his frustrations on you.
This is the needy person who calls to ask for your guidance, support, information, advice, or whatever she needs to feel better in the moment. Because of her neediness, the conversation often revolves around her, and you can almost feel the life being sucked out of you during the conversation.
This person can be hazardous to your health. The shamer may cut you off, put you down, reprimand you, or make fun of you or your ideas in front of others. He often ignores your boundaries and may try to convince you that his criticism is for your own good. The shamer is the kind of person who makes you question your own sanity before his.
This is the person who discounts or challenges everything you say. Often, she has a strong need to be right and can find fault with any position. It can be exhausting to have a conversation with the discounter, so eventually you end up giving in and deciding to just listen.
This person avoids intimacy by talking about others behind their backs. The gossip gets energy from relaying stories, opinions, and the latest “scoop.” By gossiping about others, he creates a lack of safety in his relationships, whether he realizes it or not. After all, if he’ll talk about someone else, he’ll talk about you.
Seek to surround yourself with those who lift you up.