Our bodies were designed with the ability to fight or flee when danger is upon us, such as when confronted by a mugger. When faced with this kind of danger, an automatic physical process is set in motion which gives us a burst of energy and strength, in order for us to get away. This is a natural response and vital to our survival in that situation.
However, the problem arises when that same response is triggered in less life threatening situations, such as a traffic jam or conflict with a loved one. Naturally, the less fear and anger we hold inside, the less easily we will be triggered into the stress response and the less reactive we become.
Our bodies were not designed to be in fight or flight mode all the time; as they were meant to return to normal once the perceived threat is gone. Unfortunately, in our times of chronic stress, this often doesn’t happen enough, causing damage to the body.
Therefore, the source of our fears needs to be identified and dealt with, to avoid this automatic physiological response.
Usually, our fear or angry reactions stem from the following concerns:
- Rejection – Not being accepted
- Abandonment – Being deserted
- Dependency – Having an overreliance on another person
- Being controlled – Being under the regulation, domination, or command of another
Consequently, the solution lies in doing the internal work necessary, so that our fears will gradually diminish, and be replaced by more positive results, as briefly outlined below:
- The more we learn to value ourselves, and define our own worth and lovability, the less fear we will have of rejection and abandonment.
- The more we take loving care of our own needs and feelings, the less dependency we will have upon others.
- The more our fears start to decrease, the less likely we are to allow someone to control and consume us.
Fortunately, we can reduce the chronic fight or flight response by healing the internal source of our distress that activated it in the first place.
Handle your emotions in more loving ways by identifying, facing and reducing your fears.