Archive | May 2014

Be Aware of Your Audience


a audienceWhen was the last time you had a good laugh? We recently went to a comedy club here in town, and what a treat it was. I give people so much credit for getting up in front of others and having to be funny on the spot. I’m sure it is a great experience to receive those desired laughs when a joke goes well, and not so fun when a joke falls flat.

As an audience member, it is painful to watch when the latter occurs, since it’s natural to feel bad about the entertainers presumed disappointment. At the show we attended, there were about five comediennes who performed before the headliner took over the stage. One of the comedienne’s subject matter was not working but he kept continuing with the same theme, in spite of that fact.

Usually, stand-up comics will change to several topics throughout their act to keep it interesting, and move on from what isn’t connecting with the crowd. Most of the performers we watched were very skilled at reading their audience, and laughter throughout the room reflected their ability.

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Haven’t we all been guilty of ignoring or dismissing the responses we were getting, and continued interacting the same way, despite the lack of effectiveness?

No doubt, one can’t please everybody and it’s important to be true to who we are. However, sometimes, all that’s needed is a slight modification in the way we communicate, that would make all the difference.

The show was a good reminder to ‘know our audience’ and become more aware of what is working and what isn’t in all areas of life.

Action Step:

Pay attention to the reactions you are getting. Lovingly observe if some new ‘material’ or adjustments are needed in your style of presentation.


Know Your Limits

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Many of us look to make changes in ourselves because we want to fix what we perceive to be wrong. However, oftentimes personal growth isn’t about changing ourselves, as much as it is about learning about ourselves, and our personal limitations. We all have our limits, and all we need is to know what they are, and work within them.

For instance, each of us needs different amounts of sleep, solitude, intimacy and creative time. When we exceed or decrease those levels, we don’t feel at our best. Just because our friends or family may require more or less of these things than we do, does not make us strange for our required levels.

Unfortunately, the tendency is to compare our personal limits with someone else’s, and make ourselves wrong as a result. Many of us misdiagnose ourselves as having many personality issues because we are not aware, and conscious of our limitations. This lack of knowledge can lead to poor boundaries, choices, and consequences.

Therefore, by getting to know ourselves more intimately, we will know when we’ve reached our capacity with certain people, places and things; and make more appropriate choices as a result. Additionally, we will experience more self-acceptance and appreciation for our differences as well.

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In order to discover what is uniquely right for us, we need to pay attention, and observe through trial and error what tends to work for us and what doesn’t. As such, if we find ourselves getting agitated or restless after sitting at our computer nonstop for several hours, then maybe we need to incorporate more breaks into our sitting time. Or, if we love eating pizza but experience heartburn every time we have it, then maybe we need to modify that food choice as well.

Learning our limits is not about avoiding anything that makes us uncomfortable or resisting experiences that challenges us in some way.  After all, stretching ourselves, and improving those areas that need some adjustments is very important. However, it is about doing what personally fits our particular situation, and is ideal for us, and not trying to change those things that are a matter of preference, and taste.

So, if we enjoy the ocean instead of the desert, or vacationing close to home instead of overseas, then this is not something we need to fix. Gaining wisdom about ourselves is a life long journey, but one that becomes more gratifying as we go along through the implementation of the lessons we learn along the way.

Action Step:

Give yourself a break today by embracing your personal limits. So, if you are feeling sluggish, it might be time for a nap or a walk around the block. Explore and see what works best for you!

Happy Mother’s Day

My Mom used to take me to dancing classes when I was very little, and it was a very special time for me.

As many of you know, she passed away when I was 10, but I can imagine this song says a lot of what she would have wanted to say while I was growing up.

In the spirit of Mother’s Day weekend, I wanted to pass along the beautiful song “I Hope You Dance” by Lee Ann Womack, and the wonderful message it contains.

Wishing you all a wonderful time celebrating no matter what your family situation may be.



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I Hope You Dance

Song Lyrics

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger

May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed

I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean

Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens

Promise me that you’ll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance…I hope you dance

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance

Living might mean taking chances, but they’re worth taking
Loving might be a mistake, but it’s worth making

Don’t let some Hell bent heart leave you bitter

When you come close to selling out, reconsider

Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance…I hope you dance  

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Just Do It!

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I am not one of those people who jump out of bed in excited anticipation for my morning workout. However, I do love the feeling of taking care of myself, and the exhilaration AFTER a workout is complete. Therefore, despite the mental gymnastics in deciding if I should go to the gym or not, I do manage to get to my exercise class on time.

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This process is a little like having a devil on one shoulder, and an angel on the other. One side is protesting and wanting to relax, while the other implores me to “Just Do It”, like the Nike commercials have been saying for years.

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It’s empowering to exercise regardless of my mental debates, but I am always left wondering why I resisted in the first place.

What area of life do you find challenging, and how do you resolve it?

Action Step:

Give your debating mind a rest, and do what’s good for you instead.