I was in a group the other day and we were discussing how everyone has the right to believe what they want. Ironically, when it came time to actually share some of our individual beliefs as we went around the circle, many were clearly uncomfortable and vocal about their disagreement about what people shared.
We certainly don’t have to agree with what others believe but unfortunately, there is a tendency to make others wrong for having an alternate view from our own. Many of us would agree that it doesn’t feel good to be on the receiving end of someone’s judgements about our philosophies.
Ultimately, the space was changed into a more compassionate discussion where everyone was allowed to share without fear of being judged.
Interesting enough, once the emotional atmosphere warmed up, then people felt safe enough to individually explore which of their beliefs were working for them and which ones were not.
For example, many walk around believing they aren’t very intelligent or good enough because they were compared to a sibling who got perfect grades or had other outstanding attributes.
As a result, they believe they can’t apply for certain careers because they feel inadequate for certain positions. When this belief is brought to awareness, and they expose this unhelpful thinking, then their view of themselves and their world opens up to more possibilities. If left unaware, they often don’t realize what is driving their resistance to exploring new things.
Conversely, others may feel they are always right because of their high ranking career achievements, and public accolades.
Unknowingly, this is what’s causing havoc in their relationships, as they dominate conversations, and are not open to hearing another’s point of view. They feel compelled to let you know that they are right and you are wrong. Left unaware, they may experience a succession of failed relations, and not experience the pleasure of a true partnership or the joy of learning new things.
Therefore, it is empowering to review our beliefs and see which ones are outdated. When we do this from a positive place and not from feeling defective or wrong, then we can expose and unlearn what is potentially standing in our way.
What new beliefs have you uncovered?
On a sheet of paper, list your current beliefs about aging, money, health, men, women, relationships, friends, yourself etc. and see what comes up.