Recently I was involved in a group where one of the participants was quite harsh in her communication style such as using accusatory language and hostile behavior. It made for an unpleasant experience for all the people concerned.
This kind of situation happens in work places as well, where a certain coworker can be very difficult to work with and makes our job environment very uncomfortable as well.
Unfortunately, we don’t often have control over the people who sign up for a particular group or the personnel that is hired at a company.
However, we certainly can speak up for ourselves, have boundaries, and not engage in the drama that can surround such individuals.
Interesting enough, people are often unaware of how inappropriate and unkind their communication delivery is, and when confronted will seem surprised by how they are being perceived.
Therefore, being mindful of how we speak and the tone of voice we use is so essential, and a very important goal for improving our relationships.
That said, it can be very valuable to assess our communication styles by asking ourselves the following questions in order to increase our awareness:
- Am I kind and considerate when I express myself with my tone, words, and delivery?
- Do I dominate a conversation, or do I actually listen to others, too?
- Do I become defensive when someone indicates I’ve hurt their feelings?
- Am I more focused on what I want to say than what others have to say?
- Am I open-minded enough to respect the viewpoints of others even if they differ from my own?
- Do I jump to negative conclusions about others or get offended easily?
How did you do with answering the list?